Ask Vector Prime A Question Archives
  March 10th, 2006  

Vector Prime

Hasbro's version of Ask Vector Prime A Question is a figment of your imagination. It would probably still be running if people like Wayward didn't keep sending in dumb questions like, "Can you get me the Liege Maximo's phone number?"

Q: Dear Vector Prime,
With respect to the Optimus Prime Gumball Machines ... I was wondering about that too, until you came to reside with the Insecticons. Now I believe I know: they are an early experiment at hijacking your powers when you are offline. I mean, the leader of their foes turned into a source of a food-like product? The only way I would be more sure is if he was a pudding dispenser. Can you confirm my suspicions, or rule them out? Note I didn't say they were still trying this: my theory also states they had to cease their attempts for some reason ...
Who would win in a fight against eachother: Airazor or Lazorbeak? What do you win for Transformers Transvestite Bingo?

A: The gumball machines were from the Robots in Disguise era. Possibly the Insecticons - if they are the culprits, which is extremely likely - thought the climate was goofy enough to pull off such a scheme.

The Insecticons inform me that I have won a closetful of fabulous shoes. Given my feet, I doubt they'll fit. Airazor versus Lazorbeak is a tricky one as they're both fast, skilled warriors, but I think Lazorbeak has the edge due to sheer viciousness.

And, to continue ...

Q: Reviewing my last e-mail, I realize ... it was lame. Sorry about that. I thought it was hilarious at the time ... but then I realized that I still hadn't answered the question about the Optimus Prime gumball machines in continuity. So I will go with the only logical explanation for any Transformers series: blame the idiot human that they must babysit.
A: Continuity? What is this 'continuity' you speak of? Me, I wouldn't be surprised if there was a gumball machine Autobot somewhere in Cybertron. After the stoplight fellow, anything is possible.

Q: Hey, hey, hey ... I'm back! And I've got a question or two ...
1. So ... Wayward just released a few members of the Twelve Months of Arcee calender ... what're your thoughts?
2. What're Safeguards?

A: 1) It is one of the few projects of Wayward's that I completely support. Those of you who do not haunt the Padded Cell can see January to March here.

2) We determined it was a kind of soap in an earlier issue.

Q: Vector Prime:
What the hell is with this bloke you mention called "The Fallen" and why the hell can't I find out what the devil he looks like? Additionally, who were the rest of the original Thirteen Transformers?
Thanks in advance, old-timer,
Jetstorm [Beast Machines series]
PS. Why is Cybertron Sideways cooler looking than me? I could blast his pansy ass into the next dimension!

A: I don't see why you're so worried about the Fallen - given where and when you are, he is a negligable threat to you. In your place, I might worry more about the demons. But, to the Fallen - pictures are difficult to find due to the Great Purge of Pat Lee Is A Jerk, and the Fallen was a creature who appeared solely in DreamWave books. Beings like Sunstorm survived the Purge because he already had a toy. However, if the Titanium line can have War Within toys, and if Simon Furman decides to bring back his creation, the Fallen may be revived. But, just for you and because Wayward is inordinately fond of him, a picture of the Fallen:

Of the Thirteen, few are named. Prima was the first. The Liege Maximo, the Fallen, and myself are the only others ever listed in canon. There are assorted fanon pantheons kicking around the Internet. And I already answered this one in an earlier issue. Ask me how old I am, why don't you?

Sideways is a teleporter, and thus can get to the next dimension without your help.

Q: If you can travel to to a bunch of dimensions, have you ever been to Heaven and/or Hell?
A: If I went around visiting the various afterlives humans have invented for themselves, I'd be doing nothing else. Besides, everyone knows that you go to Armada when you die. Fanfiction told me so.

Q: Dear Venerated Prime,
Why is my sanity being questioned constantly?
-Beast Machines Optimus Primal

A: It's that whole hippy thing. Plus the fact that you turned the body of Primus partially organic when the only thing holding back the demons was the metal. Jetstorm may have a few questions for you later.

Q: Dear Vector Prime,
Why is it that almost always, the Decepticons side up with Unicron? I know Decepticons are hardly nice guys, but why is it they who almost always side with the guy who intends to eat thier homeworld? It makes no sense to me!
- A frustrated historian

A: In G1, the Decepticons followed Galvatron, and Galvatron had been created by Unicron. Even then, Galvatron only worked for Unicron under duress. In Armada, the Decepticons didn't work for Unicron - Thrust did, but Thrust had issues. In Energon, the Decepticons lived in Unicron, but didn't work for him. In fact, it was Galvatron who destroyed him at the end. So while the Decepticons tend to be in the area of Unicron, they don't actually like him and do oppose him as long as he's not zapping them with a pain beam.

Q: Dear Vector Prime,
In your opinion, who is the bigger glutton, Unicron or Galactus?
- A curious observer

A: Unicron. Galactus picks and chooses, Unicron eats everything he can catch.

Q: Dear Vector Prime,
Who REALLY created the Transformers: Primus or the Quintessons?
- An Autobot who wants to know the truth.

A: Hasbro.

Fine, both. Everything happens somewhere, so what created you depends on the universe you live in. In my case, I can trace my line back to Primus. If you're a G1 cartoon character, you were built by squid.

Q: Vector Prime-san, could you please make a list of the Galaxy Force cast with TNT equivalent of their attacks?
A: I am a highly sophisticated robot and far beyond your Earthling 'TNT equivalents'.

Shrapnel says: That means he doesn't know, know.

Quiet, you. I do know some of them. Master Megatron's Death Claw and Exillion's Accel Wing are equivalent to zero.

Because neither go boom. You are a lazy old man.


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