I Can Shout With My Mouth Shut!  
By Moxie Thuringwethil
Based on multiple pictures and Dr Seuss.

[Link.]

That Megatron! That Megatron!
Oh, how he shouts and carries on
About defeating Autobots -
Tolerate them, he does not!

"This poster here for you to see
Is Optimus, our enemy.
We need to capture him today
And lock the Autobots away.
Then we can throw away the key
And leave them for eternity!"

[Link.]

"But if we're to defeat them, why
Not just attack them from the sky
And simply blast them all away?
That is a better plan, I say."

"Silly Starscream, don't you see?
You can't do that on kids' TV!
There's no point in asking why -
Come, Decepticons, and fly!"

[Link.]

Two and two and one by one,
The 'Bots were all out having fun...

(Music: "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch")

You're a mean one, Megatron.
You really are a heel.
When it comes to plans of tyranny
You never lose your zeal,
Megatron!

You look at our planet and
See your army's next meal.

[Link.]

You're a monster, Megatron.
Your villainy's so deep
You send your jets with special nets
To put the 'Bots to sleep
Megatron!

[Link.]

Couldn't you have taken Sparkplug while you were at it?
His face gives me the creeps!

[Link.]

You're a vile one, Megatron,
Sending Rumble out to call
Where he made a little earthquake
From atop a canyon wall,
Megatron!

Even a Prime is likely to get buried
When that much rock starts to fall!

You're a foul one, Megatron.
You're a nasty piece of junk
Your CPU is glitching
And your ethics board is skunked
Megatron!

The three words that best describe you are, and I quote:
"Stink. Stank. Stunk!"

[Link.]

You're a rotter, Megatron.
So's that tape recorder box
Too cowardly to fight until
poor Gears is trapped in rocks
Megatron!

Soundwave is an appalling excuse for a Decepticon who hides disgracefully behind cassettes a fraction of his own size while they do most of the actual dirty work,
What a bum ghetto boom box!

[Link.]

You nauseate me, Megatron.
So do all your Decepticons
If you could, you'd drain the earth
until its energy was gone
Megatron!

Why don't you all just find Astrotrain, get on board, and retreat while you can
Back to Cybertron!

[Link.]

"As you can see quite clearly, Prime,
Today now ends your foolish time
Of trying to resist our might.
If you should even try to fight,
Your 'Bots are helpless to resist
Their executions. Please desist,
Surrender now and step this way -
You'll be here 'til your dying day!"

Now, Prime saw Megatron was right
That this was not the time to fight
For, although, Optimus is brave,
He knew that he just couldn't save
those the Decepticons had caught.
But still, their fight was not for naught:
Though Megatron was filled with glee,
He had neglected Bumblebee!

[Link.]

"Oh, Sparkplug, Spike, what can we do?
We're far too small to just break through
and free the other Autobots -
Hey, wait a minute, I know what
To do! The three of us now should
Get tools and paint and nails and wood.
I know you both can build, and quick.
A giant 'Bot should do the trick.
If you can make it to distract
The prison guards, then I can act -
While they're away, I'll just sneak in,
Free all the 'Bots, then we will win!"

[Link.]

Laserbeak put on his kohl
and left to fly out on patrol,
But something quickly made him stop:
a 'Bot tall as a mountaintop!
Since Laserbeak is cowardly,
he didn't fly around to see
The view of that behemoth's back:
Just Spike and Sparkplug's wood and tacks.
No, back to Megatron he flew,
His pretty lashes quite askew.

[Link.]

As you can surely guess, of course,
Decepticons went out in force
To neutralize the giant threat
With which they all had been beset.
Soon Megatron was quite dismayed
To realize they'd all been played!

[Link.]

But meanwhile, Bumblebee had passed
The 'Cons and sneaked into their vast
And gloomy penitentiary.
"Now where can all the others be?
If we don't soon make our escape,
I'll get us all in quite a scrape.
Oh, no more need to go explore;
The 'Cons put signs on all their doors!"

[Link.]

"Come on out, the door's unlocked!"
The Autobots all stood and gawked:
Not one in all that prison pit
Had thought to try to open it!

[Link.]

So if you're not so big and strong,
Don't fear that you might not belong,
For you can be a hero, too,
If you just use your CPU!
You see, the smallest saved the day -
Hooray for Bumblebee! Hooray!

 

Transformers (c) Takara/Hasbro/etc. "Bumblebee" coloring book (c) Marvel Books Dr. Seuss' works including "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" lyrics (c) himself. "You're a Mean One..." music by Albert Hague, original vocals by Thurl Ravenscroft.

 

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